It's amazing what you can find sometimes in the local listings on Craig's List!  This is the actual ad...you can't make this stuff up!

                    Desperately Seeking Noah:

 

Noah, I have called you about your chickens, you have ignored me. What is it that makes you not want your chickens to live with me? Have you heard rumors that I am a bad chicken owner? Well that is false. I am a wonderful chicken owner, my chickens LOVE me. I sing to them, feed them bananas and I am planning a mural of chicken in socks to be painted in their coop. I decided on a chicken in socks to remind them to keep their little feet warm so they don't get frost bite and fall off. I am doing this because I care about them because I am a good chicken owner.

Noah I don't want your goats because goats can be bad. They like to eat everything and they stand on cars. My car is very old and can't take that kind of abuse. So I can't take your goats. I will take a picture of your goats and put it on my fridge so you know that I care about your goats, but they can't live here.

Noah email me with your chicken owner requirements. Don't ignore me Noah I just want your chickens.